Battle Wounds

11 Jul

Recently I was lucky enough to go to Las Vegas for a wedding with my husband.  My husband was in the wedding party and therefore had some obligations during the day, so I was on my own. It was over 100 degrees so I decided to head to the pool.

I think of myself as having an average body however when I got to the pool I felt like compared to the other women there I should be a contestant on The Biggest Loser. The women were not only gorgeous but their bodies were amazing. I know because their bathing suits left little to the imagination. In fact I soon found out that the pool was “adults only” aka topless (optional thank goodness). Suddenly my chic one-piece bathing suit was not looking so cool.

Yes not only do I rock the one piece, I wear a Spanx one piece. No, I am not 75, I am 31. However, I have multiple scars due to surgeries I have had to have because of cancer treatment side effects. I am deeply embarrassed of these scars. Even though they are obviously not something I can prevent they make me feel flawed. More than that, they make me feel exposed. Finally, when they are visible, I find that instead of people asking me what they are from, they just stare and probably make their own inaccurate assumptions.

So I am sitting at this topless pool very covered up and a woman walked by me. The woman was at least 75 years old and topless. Nothing seemed to be enhanced (please, everyone was looking) and I had an epiphany. This woman was proud of her body but why can’t I be proud of mine? Why am I so embarrassed of these scars? These are my battle wounds and I should be proud.

I don’t think this should just apply or surgical scars. There is so much pressure for women and men to look perfect. For  example why is there so much media coverage on new\celebrity moms losing weight? They just had a BABY (or sometimes multiple). Let them enjoying being a parent before TMZ jumps on them for not being 100 pounds. It’s not just those in People Magazine. There are multiple books on Amazon about losing baby fat.

So, while I am not going to buy a string bikini, maybe next summer my one piece will be cut a little lower. I am going to try to stop judging people in my US Weekly when it looks like they have gained or lost a few pounds. Just like people don’t know my circumstance, I don’t know theirs.

Hope you’re enjoying your summer and don’t forget the sunscreen!

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2 Responses to “Battle Wounds”

  1. laraine levy July 13, 2011 at 8:53 am #

    Loved your post – you should be proud of your “battle wounds” they represent your ever present spirit!
    xoxo
    mom

  2. alison nakash July 14, 2011 at 9:04 pm #

    You are beautiful inside and out! Stand proud and enjoy life!

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